Born in the UK, grew up in Indonesia and Thailand and then living most of my adult life in the US, the Netherlands and Switzerland, who I am and my life are “colorful”.
My life consists of many mixtures: Corporate warrior and business owner, East and West cultures, creative and structured (in many ways), driven by both intuition and logic, and many more.
The way I see myself, others and the world in general are influenced by these mixtures. It blurs out the illusions that there are “boxes” we often group ourselves in. Human are human, anywhere, and we all wanting the same thing: to belong, to love and be loved back.
These mixtures are wonderful elements in my life now. However, I was not always comfortable having these blends. It made me stood out and I did not like it. I used to believe that to belong meant that I could not be too different than others. I was not at ease being the “polka-dotted zebra” that I was. Until I decided to love all of these “colors” equally. This is the catalyst of my inner-peace’s growth.
In the past, I also believed that I had to achieve so much to be accepted and loved. These were unconscious programs that drove my decisions for decades. These programs were useful for my life goals, however, until they stopped being relevant. For many years, such beliefs leaped me forward in my life. I left my comfort zones regularly. I learned new things, developed expertise, made great friends, earned great salary and recognised with a great reputation. Success looked like that to me then.
However, sometimes the effort took way too much out of me. I remembered the days when I could not appreciate the praises that were offered to me. Instead of taking them all in and be happy with them, setting the bar even higher was what I did. Moreover, under an immense pressure, I resorted only to my mind, and not both my mind and my heart. This proved to be inadequate.